Today’s Feature Friday is@lins_allen ♥️ She has some amazing advice and a touching story. She is an incredible woman and example!
We are the Allens. We have 2 boys and an angel daughter. Like so many couples we have struggled to grow our family. We have experienced miscarriages, infertility & loss. After 3 miscarriages we decided to see a fertility Dr. It was then I found out I had PCOS, which explained our miscarriages. We did a few rounds of IUIs with no success. Next step: IVF. That process is overwhelming, but you do it in the hopes of having a baby. 2 wks after the transfer is test day. I thought of our losses & the ultrasounds that ended with, “Your baby no longer has a heart beat. I’m so sorry”. I had gotten use to saying, “It’s okay, we’ll keep trying”. Infertility is a hard, bitter pill to swallow! BUT we got good news, baby girl Allen was going to join our family.
At our 6 month appt, the tech was quiet. I thought, “We did genetic testing, she’s okay”. The Dr came in. With 1 swipe over my belly, he looked up & said the same sentence I had heard 3 times already. With tears running down my cheeks, I quietly said, “It’s okay, we’ll keep trying”. She passed away due to her umbilical cord getting twisted.
On Aug. 5, 2017 I delivered our angel daughter. It was the hardest day, but also the most spiritual. I was so proud to be her mom. To play a roll in her receiving her perfect, tiny body. We named her Skyelar & told our son that anytime he got sad or felt alone, he could look up to the sky & know she is watching over us. She is flying among the stars & will always be our Skye. I can’t wait to hear her stories when we meet again!
-The 1st yr I wanted to remember her in a special way. Every month I left a balloon that represented the sky at her resting place. Each month the bouquet of balloons grew. Instead of a monthly “watch my baby grow” it became a “watch the sky grow for our Skye”. The cemetery became a place of love & healing.
-Skyelar was buried with a little lamb. We each have one & call it our Skyelar lamb. We take family photos with it to represent her.
Tell your story. You will make healing connections.
-Don’t let anger replace love. Joy & grief is a sacred dance.
-Make a yearly motto (trust, love, hope) & focus on how that can help you heal.
-Celebrate the little victories!
-Never give up! 6 months later we did IVF again & welcomed our son.
Our story is filled with ups & downs, loss & love. We wish Skye was here, but we know she is watching over us. She has filled our home with love. Im thankful for our family story ❤️